Humanae Vitae and Creighton NFP

Today marks the 44th anniversary of the proclamation of the papal document Humanae Vitae, a document in which Pope Paul VI beautifully teaches the value of family and life. This document was written as contraception was on the verge of becoming widely accepted and looking at it now one can see how deeply prophetic it is. Pope Paul VI warns that if society accepts the birth control pill we will see wide spread marital infidelity, disregard for the value of women, and government imposed contraception. We have for years seen the evils of his first two predictions and with the new HHS mandate we see the third coming into full force. All together spooky and amazing if you ask me! When Humanae Vitae was given to the Church many scoffed at it and said the Holy Father was being ridiculous. If only the world had listened to him and trusted the guidance of Holy Mother Church think how much better off society and the family unit would be today.

As I reflect on Humanae Vitae today I think too about the process Eric and I are going through to learn more about the beauty of human fertility. Natural Family Planning is a church approved natural way to achieve or avoid (if serious and grave reasons are present) pregnancy. There are a few forms of NFP out there but the method Eric and I have chosen to learn is the Creighton model. This system of fertility care was designed to treat infertility but can also be used to avoid pregnancy if needed. I love this method because the focus is over all fertility awareness and care. The reason Eric and I specifically love this method is because we are hoping to start a family right away and this method allows us to see the times when pregnancy is most likely to occur as well as identify any potential issues. What is so amazing is that during these few months before our wedding we are working with a Creighton practitioner to make sure my fertility is healthy and that I will be able to first of all get pregnant and second of all be able to sustain a pregnancy. They will be able to identify and treat any possible issues before we are even at the point of trying for a family. Taking these classes has made me deeply aware of the gift of my fertility. On any given day both Eric and I can look at my chart and know exactly what is going on with my cycle. I think of so many women who take pills to suppress their God given system of fertility and I am saddened that in most cases they simply do not know what they are doing to themselves. I am in awe of my body as I watch my chart and see how it works. God is amazing and I can see evidence of Him in the way the body works. I pray today on the anniversary of Humanae Vitae that more woman and men would come to love the precious and amazing gift of fertility, life and family!

If you would like more information on Creighton NFP here is the link for you. If you have ever experienced infertility including miscarriage I HIGHLY recommend you look into this. Creighton has proven to be the most effective at treating infertility.
http://www.creightonmodel.com/

Also here is a link to the encyclical Humanae Vitae.
http://www.vatican.va/holy_father/paul_vi/encyclicals/documents/hf_p-vi_enc_25071968_humanae-vitae_en.html

Parker Mattson Family Trip

Sorry I have been MIA for a bit. I have been busy writing papers for grad school and vacationing with Eric's family in Parker, AZ. We had a wonderful trip with the the entire Mattson family. It was Eric's 35th birthday and we celebrated right with lots of yummy food. I had a blast cooking for the group and spoiling my pre-husband (as Big Eric called him). Here are a few pictures Chris captured of the trip!

Big Eric and Chris

Birthday Breakfast Spread

Birthday Flowers for Chris for giving Eric life 35 years ago

My present to Eric was framed copies of his band's CDs

Frosting Eric's birthday cake

The Whole Group

Proverbs 31:15

She rises also while it is still night

And gives food to her household

 

When I read this first line all I could think about was my dear girlfriends who so often get up with a restless baby in order to allow their husband to continue sleeping. What a beautiful sacrifice women make when they sacrifice sleep to care for their family. A good wife will sacrifice even sleep for the good of her family.

 

The second line here about giving food to the household brings me back to a blog post I made several weeks ago about cooking. I really believe this is a great skill that every wife needs to have. They don't say "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach" for nothing. Food gives life and is an act of love and charity when done for others. Remember the reference to doing work joyfully from a few lines earlier? That should apply here too. A good wife will spend a lot of time in the kitchen but this can be a beautiful task if seen as an act of love.

 

A little note to any men reading this: 

If your wife cooks for you be gracious and thankful. Even if you think you could have cooked the meal better, don't criticize. Approach each meal with an attitude of thankfulness. It always makes me feel really appreciated when Eric thanks be for cooking for him. He is a great cook himself but he always shows so much gratitude for any meals I make him, not necessarily because they are award winning but because he knows that I cook out of love for him and he appreciates my efforts.

 

Like a Merchant Ship

She is like merchant ships

She brings her food from afar

Merchant ships travel great distances to bring the goods that they carry sometimes having to even endure great storms to get to there. A good wife is much the same, she will go to great lengths to meet the needs of her family. I do not mean to advocate wives working outside the home for I certainy belive that this is the duty of the husband but the needs of the family extend further than monitary support. A good wife will use the resources earned by the hard work of her husband to meet the physical needs of her family. I think this also applies to the emotional and spiritual needs to a family. I can think of so many wives and mothers who stayed awake countless nights praying for wayward children, consoling a sick child who can not sleep, thinking and praying over the work stresses of her spouse, and much more. A good wife will endure great storms with her husband and children in order to help them arrive safely at their destination which is heaven. A merchant ships pushes forward with great strength even when the journey is tough. How many looking back at their mothers would describe them as strong women who often times help the family together during difficulties. The strength of a wife and mother is incredible, just think if the strength of the Blessed Mother as she watched her son die on a cross. Mary endured a great trial and storm that day for the sake of ALL her children.

Words of Wisdom

A small break today from Provrbs 31 to share a great photo I saw today

Willing Hands...

The Catholic RSV translation of Proverbs 31:13 reads "She seeks wool and flax, and works with willing hands." To be honest I struggled today trying to discover what the Lord is telling us. I did a Google search for reflections on this verse and found that a lot of women believe it means a good wife is resourceful with her money. I agree that she is but I think their might be more to this verse than that because this is a Queen talking to her son who is a King so I am not sure being thrifty was a concern to her. Prayerfully digging further my mind started to focus more on the last two words "willing hands." Being a wife involves work; there are duties that she is responsible for and reflecting on these last two words of this verse I began to see the importance of doing those duties willingly and with joy. Another translation says she "works with her hands in delight." Saint Therese taught that we can serve God in the small things. Maybe one of the messages God is conveying to us through this passage is the importance of finding joy even in the seemingly unpleasant duties of family life. One might grumble about having to clean the house or get the kids to soccer practice or do her husbands laundry but how much better would it be if we saw those chores as opportunities to lovingly serve? How much more joy would it bring to every day if we approached each little bit of work as an act of love for our family and for Our Lord? Proverbs 31 is all about being a good wife. Maybe part of being a good wife is as simple as being joyful about the every day work and duties that are part of this great vocation.

She does him good and not evil...

"She does him good and not evil all the days of her life"

This verse from Proverbs 31 I think is the most straight forward and easy to understand but can be the most difficult sometimes to live out. We live in a culture where love is understood to be an emotion and when we don't "feel" love we assume we aren't really in love anymore, hence high divorce rates. Love is not an emotion it is a choice. If we want to know what love is we need to look to Christ who is the source of all love. What was Christ's supreme act of love? He died on a cross for us. Do you think he "felt" good at that moment? Of course not, so love is not about how we feel. Love is a choice to do what is best for the beloved. I know that there will be times in marriage when love will be tough. I am sure some people look at my blog posts and say "they are still in the honeymoon stage of love and she has no idea how tough it will be and how hard it will become to live out the things she writes about (actually I have already had people tell me this)." I agree that we are in the honeymoon phase of love (and I love it!) and I understand that life long love is a challenge but I do not agree that means I won't be able to live out the things about which I write. If a woman really loves her husband than she will work at every moment to act in ways that are best for him. Out of love for us God humbled himself, became man, and died a very painful death. God is not going to ask me to hang on a cross for my spouse but he is going to ask me to die to myself for him. Will this be easy? If I try to do it on my own it will be impossible; if I do it with Christ it will absolutely be possible. At every moment God gives us the grace we need to do His will  and to love others the way he loves them. My future spouse is not perfect and neither am I but in our imperfection God perfectly love us. With the grace of God helping us we can chose at every moment to love each other. One great piece if practical advice I recently heard that has helped with this is whenever there is tension stop and pray the rosary before you discuss the issue. Through that prayer Our Lady will help clear your mind, unite the husband and wife in prayer and center them on Christ before they discuss the issue at hand.

A good wife does her husband good and not evil all the days of his life. Lord, grant that myself and all women remember this verse any time we are tempted to nag, snap at, ridcule, or do anything with a lack of love towards our husbands. Help us to use you as our model and love even when the other does not appear worthy of our love. Give us the grace to persevere in love throughout our entire lives and never take for granted to love of our spouse. May we work every day to love our hubands more and better than we did the previous day. And when we fail to love help us to rely on you to seek forgiveness and seek your grace to avoid falling again.